Related:

• When I did my self-portrait, I left all the pimples out because you always should.
  Pimples are a temporary condition and they don't have anything to do with what you really look like....
• When you don't know what to do, walk fast and look worried.
• You can tell what a person is by what they do when they haven't anything to do.
• You know you should be swimming when . . . You can't look at a girl without wondering what her tail would look like.
• Who invented cottage cheese? And how did they know when they were done?
  It looks like it's already been eaten. Never buy anything you have to order by the size of its curd....
• YOU look like an elephant!
• The more time you spend in reporting on what you are doing, the less time you have to do anything.
  Stability is achieved when you spend all your time reporting on the nothing you are doing....
• Cohn's Law: The more time you spend in reporting on what you are doing, the less time you have to do anything.
  Stability is achieved when you spend all your time reporting on the nothing you are doing....
• Say to the salesman: Do you have anything I would like?