Related:

• You may be redneck... if you have every episode of "Hee-Haw" on tape.
• You may be redneck... if you're still upset that "Hee Haw" was canceled.
• Homer: _That's_ what ballet is? [whining] Oh -- Marge
  You promised! You can't back out like when you volunteered for that Army experiment to avoid dinner at my sisters'....
• I want to buy a husband who, every week when I sit down to watch `St.
  Elsewhere', won't scream, `FORGET IT, BLANCHE ......
• I want to buy a husband who, every week when I sit down to watch `St.
  Elsewhere', won't scream, `FORGET IT, BLANCHE ......
• I want to buy a husband who, every week when I sit down to watch "St.
  Elsewhere", won't scream, "Forget it, Blanche... It's time for Hee-Haw!...
• CFE Call Field Engineer [What do you call them?]
• What do they call a woman without an asshole? Divorced.