Related:

• Bother! said Pooh, as he wiped the vomit from his chin.
• Did you hear that Woody Allen's girlfriend is pregnant with his next girlfriend?
• Q: What's the last thing that goes through a grasshopper's mind when he hits your windshield?
  A: His ass....
• A guy went to a party wearing shoes with high heels.
  He put peanut butter in the empty space. He sat with one leg crossed over the other so that the peanut butter was plainly visible....
• If he had half a brain, his ass would be lopsided.
• Well, he didn't know what to do, so he decided to look at the government, to see what they did, and scale it down and run his life that way.
  -- Laurie Anderso...
• A cannibal only opens his mouth to change your feet.
• A castaway was washed ashore after many days on the open sea.
  The island on which he landed was populated by savage cannibals who tied him, dazed and exhausted, to a thick stake....
• Did you hear about the basketball player who was so tall that his girlfriend had to go up on him.