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• If you are not for yourself, who will be for you? If you are for yourself, then what are you?
  If not now, when?...
• Simple rules for saving money: to save half, when you are fired by an eager impulse to contribute to a charity, wait and count forty.
  To save three-quarters, count sixty. To save it all, count sixty- five. -- Mark Twai...
• You only killed the bride's father, that's all!
• It's not how much money you make; it's how much you save that counts!
• You may now consider yourself a "Seasoned Adventurer".
• To Smokers: If you smoke, may I fart in your face?
• To Smokers: If you smoke, may I rip a stinky in your face?
• All you have to do to see the accuracy of my thesis is look around you.
  Look, in particular, at the people who, like you, are making average incomes for doing average jobs - bank vice presidents, insurance salesmen, auditors, secretaries of defense - and you'll realize they all dress the same way, essentially the way the mannequins in the Sears menswear department dress....
• Troi: "You've made tremendous progress." Barclay: "I, uh, I, I guess.
  Troi: "Don't you think so?" Barclay: "Well, I just feel more comfortable, uh, playing somebody else....