Related:

• A thousand things advance; nine hundred and ninety-nine retrea
  that is progress. -- Henry Frederic Amiel, Swiss philosophe...
• How many mothers in law -- does it take to change a light bulb?
  A hundred. One to change it and the other ninety nine to say, "I told you so!...
• How many sopranos -- does it take to screw in a light bulb?
  One hundred. One to do it, and ninety-nine to discuss how it was really too high for her....
• I have defined the hundred per cent American as ninety-nine per cent an idiot.
  -- George Bernard Shaw...
• SAUCE, n. The one infallible sign of civilization and enlightenment.
  A people with no sauces has one thousand vices; a people with one sauce has only nine hundred and ninety-nine....
• How many pre-med students -- does it take to change a light bulb?
  One hundred; one to change the light bulb, the other ninety-nine to stand around wondering why they weren't chosen....
• Pooh, will you always remember me, even when I'm a hundred?
  asked Christopher Robin. Pooh thought for a minute....
• The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy", in a moment of reasoned lucidity which is almost unique among its current tally of five millio
  ine hundred and seventy-three thousand, five hundred and nine pages, says of the Sirius Cybernetics Corporation products that "it is very easy to be blinded to the essential uselessness of them by the sense of achievement you get from getting them to work at all....
• Ninety-nine percent of all failures come from people who have the habit of making excuses.
  -- George Washington Carve...