The highway cop said, "Walk a straight line." I said,

The highway cop said, "Walk a straight line." I said, "Well, Officer
Pythagoras, the closest you could ever come to achieving a straight line
would be making an electroencephalogram of your own brain waves." I said,
"Officer, I'm taking my mom to the hospital. She OD'd on reducing pills."
He said, "I don't see any woman with you." I said, "I'm too late." He said,
"You're under arrest. You have the right to remain silent. Do you wish to
retain that right?" I thought: Oooooh! A paradox ...
-- Emo Philips