Related:

• Science may have found a cure for most evils; but it has found no remedy for the worst of them all -- the apathy of human beings.
  Helen Kelle...
• Having discovered an illness, it's not terribly useful to prescribe death as a cure.
  -- George McGove...
• Scientists discovered it.
• dread high-bit disease n. A condition endemic to some now-obsolete computers and peripherals (including ASR-33 teletypes and PRIME minicomputers) that results in all characters having their high (0x80) bit forced on.
  This of course makes transporting files to other systems much more difficult, not to mention the problems these machines have talking with true 8-bit devices....
• NEW YORK-- Kraft Foods, Inc. announced today that its board of directors unanimously rejected the $
  11 billion takeover bid by Philip Morris and Co. A Kraft spokesman stated in a press conference that the offer was rejected because the $...
• In labor news, longshoremen walked off the piers today
  escue operations are continuing ... -- George Carli...
• dread high-bit disease: n. A condition endemic to PRIME (a.
  k.a. PR1ME) minicomputers that results in all the characters having their high (0x80) bit ON rather than OFF....
• Marry an orphan: you'll never have to spend boring holidays with the in-laws (at most an occasional visit to the cemetery).
  -- George Carli...