Related:

• PHYSICIAN, n. One upon whom we set our hopes when ill and our dogs when well.
  -- Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary...
• AMNESTY, n. The state's magnanimity to those offenders whom it would be too expensive to punish.
  -- Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary...
• Fashion, n. A despot whom the wise ridicule and obey. -- Ambrose Bierce "The Devil's Dictionary
• RECOUNT, n. In American politics, another throw of the dice, accorded to the player against whom they are loaded.
  -- Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary...
• ACQUAINTANCE, n. A person whom we know well enough to borrow from, but not well enough to lend to.
  A degree of friendship called slight when its object is poor or obscure, and intimate when he is rich or famous....
• Acquaintance, n.: A person whom we know well enough to borrow from, but not well enough to lend to.
  -- Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary...
• PATRIOT, n. One to whom the interests of a part seem superior to those of the whole.
  The dupe of statesmen and the tool of conquerors. -- Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary...
• PRESENT, n. That part of eternity dividing the domain of disappointment from the realm of hope.
  -- Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary...