Related:

• PLEASE STOP READING THIS MESSAGE NOW.
• Please reply to message before reading this tagline.
• I'm a vampire. Please wash your neck.
• Hi. This is Dan Cassidy's answering machine. Please leave your name and number.
  .. and after I've doctored the tape, your message will include bombing Tripoli....
• Please affix a 29-cent stamp on your next message.
• You have reached the Des Moines chapter of the Iowa Procrastination Society.
  Please leave a message after the tone and we'll get around to it....
• Hi! You have reached 962-0129. None of us are here to answer the phone and the cat doesn't have opposing thumbs, so his messages are illegible.
  Please leave your name and message after the beep......
• Thank you for reading this message!
• General failure error reading drive A: Please remove your fist.