Related:

• Ever notice how a dog likes to bark at a drunk? And vice versa? -- Pat Buttram
• Pat Buchanan wants a blinder, more Gentile nation. [D. Miller]
• I may not be right, but I make up for it by being sure.
• The $1.98 funeral--naturally that's not an elaborate ceremony.
  In fact, they don't bury you for that. They put you in a plain brown envelope and mail you out of town....
• Anyone can suck a toothpick!!
• An optimist stays up until midnight to see the new year in.
  A pessimist stays up to make sure the old year leaves....
• Homer: Barney! How'd you like to sing for our group?
  Barney: [On the bathroom floor] Sure, why not? [searching] Now, where's me toothpick?...
• The only reason so many people came to his funeral is that they wanted to make sure he was dead.
  -- Sam Goldwyn on Louis B. Maye...
• MSPI: Make Sure Plugged I