Related:

• The more you act like a lady, the more he'll act like a gentleman. -- Sydney Biddle Barrow
• Hello, this is Sally's microwave. Her answering machine just eloped with her tape deck, so I'm stuck taking her calls.
  Say, if you want anything cooked while you leave your message, just hold it up to the phone....
• A Freudian slip is when you say one thing but mean your mother.
• Remember that as a teenager you are in the last stage of your life when you will be happy to hear that the phone is for you.
  -- Fran Lebowitz...
• You'll never be the man your mother was!
• You'll never be the man your mother was!
• Remember that as a teenager you are in the last stage of your life when you will be happy to hear that the phone is for you.
  -- Fran Lebowitz, "Social Studie...