Related:

• If I had any humility I would be perfect. -- Ted Turne
• Pray for Ted Turner, he's in need!!
• Lisa: Ohhh, my family just doesn't understand my new found vegetarianism.
  Compared to them the public schools are a haven of enlightenment....
• Oh my God! Space aliens! Don't eat me, I have a wife and kids!
  Eat them. -- Homer Simpson Treehouse of Horror VII...
• Ted Turner Virus: Colorizes your monochrome monitor.
• The reason I look unhappy is that tonight I have to see a slide show starring my wife's sisters -- or as I call them, `the gruesome twosome.
  ' -- Homer Simpson Krusty Gets Busted...