Related:

• Modem sex, the next best thing to being there.
• Nerds, don't like phone sex, it means we have to unplug the modem.
• SMILEY ||*) handshake accepted
• SMILEY ||*( handshake offered
• whalesong n. The peculiar clicking and whooshing sounds made by a PEP modem such as the Telebit Trailblazer as it tries to synchronize with another PEP modem for their special high-speed mode.
  This sound isn't anything like the normal two-tone handshake between conventional V-series modems and is instantly recognizable to anyone who has heard it more than once....
• whalesong: n. The peculiar clicking and whooshing sounds made by a PEP modem such as the Telebit Trailblazer as it tries to synchronize with another PEP modem for their special high-speed mode.
  This sound isn't anything like the normal two-tone handshake between conventional modems and is instantly recognizable to anyone who has heard it more than once....
• war dialer n. A cracking tool, a program that calls a given list or range of phone numbers and records those which answer with handshake tones (and so might be entry points to computer or telecommunications systems).
  Some of these programs have become quite sophisticated, and can now detect modem, fax, or PBX tones and log each one separately....
• A handshake isn't worth the paper it is written on. JUDGE WAPNER
• My modem can beat up your modem!