Related:

• Condoms are like listening to a symphony with cotton in your ears.
• May your computer grow hands and massage your feet.
• One of the best ways to persuade others is with your ears--by listening. -- Dean Rusk
• Creationism: Listening to reason with fingers in ears.
• May your toes grow 5 foot hairs that cannot be cut.
• The best thing for being sad, replied Merlin, beginning to puff and blow, is to learn something.
  That's the only thing that never fails. You may grow old and trembling in your anatomies, you may lie awake at night listening to the disorder of your veins, you may miss your only love, you may see the world about you devastated by evil lunatics, or know your honour trampled in the sewers of baser minds....
• The best thing for being sad," replied Merlin, beginning to puff and blow, "is to learn something.
  That's the only thing that never fails. You may grow old and trembling in your anatomies, you may lie awake at night listening to the disorder of your veins, you may miss your only love, you may see the world about you devastated by evil lunatics, or know your honour trampled in the sewers of baser minds....