Related:

• MONSIGNOR, n. A high ecclesiastical title, of which the Founder of our religion overlooked the advantages.
  -- Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary...
• DRAMATIST, n. One who adapts plays from the French. -- Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary
• NIRVANA, n. In the Buddhist religion, a state of pleasurable annihilation awarded to the wise, particularly to those wise enough to understand it.
  -- Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary...
• EXTINCTION, n. The raw material out of which theology created the future state.
  -- Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary...
• SAUCE, n. The one infallible sign of civilization and enlightenment.
  A people with no sauces has one thousand vices; a people with one sauce has only nine hundred and ninety-nine....
• Deliberation, n.: The act of examining one's bread to determine which side it is buttered on.
  -- Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary...
• EXPOSTULATION, n. One of the many methods by which fools prefer to lose their friends.
  -- Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary...
• Labor, n.: One of the processes by which A acquires property for B.
  -- Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary...