Related:

• SCEPTER, n. A king's staff of office, the sign and symbol of his authority.
  It was originally a mace with which the sovereign admonished his jester and vetoed ministerial measures by breaking the bones of their proponents....
• ADDER, n. A species of snake. So called from its habit of adding funeral outlays to the other expenses of living.
  -- Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary...
• In our civilization, and under our republican form of government, intelligence is so highly honored that it is rewarded by exemption from the cares of office.
  -- Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary...
• PLEASURE, n. The least hateful form of dejection. -- Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary
• PIRACY, n. Commerce without its folly-swaddles, just as God made it.
  -- Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary...
• Barometer, n.: An ingenious instrument which indicates what kind of weather we are having.
  -- Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary...