Related:

• A young monk asked his teacher, "What is the true spiritual nature of life?
  His teacher picked up a bowl of water and threw it in the student's face, saying "Go wash out your mouth!...
• The world's most avid baseball fan (an Aggie) had arrived at the stadium for the first game of the World Series only to realize he had left his ticket at home.
  Not wanting to miss any of the first inning, he went to the ticket booth and got in a long line for another seat....
• Brain him with his lady's fan. -- William Shakespeare (1564-1616), King Henry IV -- Act ii, Sc. 3
• A five-year-old kid raised his hand at school. The teacher declined to let him leave the room.
  Five minutes later she reversed herself. She said, "All right, Sonny, you may go now....
• The departing division general manager met a last time with his young successor and gave him three envelopes.
  My predecessor did this for me, and I'll pass the tradition along to you," he said....
• Lisa: My name is Lisa Simpson and I made a chart of all the suspects in the Burns case.
  Look! [holds up a card] Mr. Burns hurt all these people financially....
• Brief History Of Linux (#12) A note from Bill Gates' second grade teache
  Billy has been having some trouble behaving in class lately....
• I am trying here to prevent anyone saying the really foolish thing that people often say about Him
  I'm ready to accept Jesus as a great moral teacher, but I don't accept His claim to be God....
• Much to his Mum and Dad's dismay, Horace ate himself one day.
  He didn't stop to say his grace, he just sat down and ate his face....