Related:

• Kirk: "I would like to speak to someone in authority.
  Aelborne: "We, we don't have anybody in authority....
• Homer: [on the phone with Bart] I'm bringing Michael Jackson home to stay with us for a few days.
  [aside] Isn't that cute, he's heard of you....
• I like having a machine called 'elvis' on the network because that way, I can say 'ping elvis' and have it come back with 'elvis is alive'.
  -- Carl Shipley...
• Marge: I can't believe our government would set up Bart like that!
  I'm must say, I'm very angry at the State Department right now....
• I think Michael is like litmus paper - he's always trying to learn.
  -- Elizabeth Taylor, absurd non-sequitur about Michael Jackso...
• Last night I watched the news from Washington (the Capitol).
  The Russians had escaped while we weren't watching them (like Russians will)....
• Well, it's a little rough... it might not be necessary to drag him 40 blocks.
  Maybe just four. You could put him in the trunk for the first 36 blocks, then haul him out and drag him the last fou...
• If we cannot now end our differences, at least we can help make the world safe for diversity.
  -- John Fitzgerald Kennedy (1917-1963)...
• Say to the salesman: Do you have anything I would like?