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• User: My printer doesn't work. Where do I get a new one?
  Admin: Are you sure that all the connections are hooked up properly?...
• Clippit Charged With Attempted Murder Microsoft's Dancing Paper Clip turned violent last week and nearly killed a university student testing a new Windows-based human-computer interface.
  The victim is expected to make a full recovery, although psychiatrists warn that the incident may scar him emotionally for life....
• Where can I get one of those computer bats!!
• The Magician of the Ivory Tower brought his latest invention for the master programmer to examine.
  The magician wheeled a large black box into the master's office while the master waited in silence....
• A computer salesman visits a company president for the purpose of selling the president one of the latest talking computers.
  Salesman: "This machine knows everything. I can ask it any quesstion and it'll give the correct answer....
• A novice went into the master's cubicle and saw a new computer sitting upon the master's desk.
  "What is that computer?" asked the novice. The master placed his hand upon a small box that was connected to the computer by a wire....
• I entertain myself by trying to get my computer to work.
• My computer has cables... So why can't I get HBO?
• I didn't do it, the computer did it!