Related:

• I stopped believing in Santa Claus when my mother took me to see him in a department store, and he asked for my autograph.
  -- Shirley Temple...
• Last week a cop stopped me in my car. He asked me if I had a police record.
  I said, no, but I have the new DEVO album. Cops have no sense of humor....
• Last week a cop stopped me in my car. He asked me if I had a police record.
  I said, no, but I have the new DEVO album. Cops have no sense of humor....
• When I was young we didn't have MTV; we had to take drugs and go to concerts. -- Steven Pearl
• When I was young we didn't have MTV; we had to take drugs and go to concerts." -- Steven Pearl
• Troy: [laughing] That's too funny! I can't remember when I've heard a funnier anecdote.
  [laughing] All right, now you tell one. Selma: Well, not much happens to me....