In the Bowling Alley of Tomorrow, there will even be machines that wear rental shoes and throw the ball for you.

Related:

• We have fun--that's what I like about bowling. You can have fun even if you stink,
  unlike in, say, tennis. Every decade or so, I attempt...
• You may be redneck...
  if you have a bumper sticker on your bowling ball...
• You men out there probably think you already know how to dress for success.
  You know, for example, that you should not wear leisure...
• You men out there probably think you already know how to dress for success.
  You know, for example, that you should not wear leisure...
• You may be redneck...
  if you've ever been banished from a bowling alley...
• Marge: Excuse me, where do I throw this? Attendant:
  Over there. Marge: Thank you. [heads off] Attendant...
• You can't drink negative beer. Well, I guess you could throw up.
  Forbes Math Elective...
• At least once in your life,
  you will step in a substance so hideous that you will...