Related:

• PHONOGRAPH, n. An irritating toy that restores life to dead noises.
  -- Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary...
• PREROGATIVE, n. A sovereign's right to do wrong. -- Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary
• POPULIST, n. A fossil patriot of the early agricultural period, found in the old red soapstone underlying Kansa
  characterized by an uncommon spread of ear, which some naturalists contend gave him the power of flight, though Professors Morse and Whitney, pursuing independent lines of thought, have ingeniously pointed out that had he possessed it he would have gone elsewhere....
• REALITY, n. The dream of a mad philosopher. That which would remain in the cupel if one should assay a phantom.
  The nucleus of a vacuum. -- Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary...
• QUOTATION, n. The act of repeating erroneously the words of another.
  The words erroneously repeated. Intent on making his quotation truer, He sought the page infallible of Brewer, Then made a solemn vow that we would be Condemned eternally....
• ACCORD, n. Harmony. -- Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary
• IMPUNITY, n. Wealth. -- Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary
• TRUCE, n. Friendship. -- Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary
• AUSTRALIA, n. A country lying in the South Sea, whose industrial and commercial development has been unspeakably retarded by an unfortunate dispute among geographers as to whether it is a continent or an island.
  -- Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary...