Related:

• That's fine for you, Marge. But I used to rock and roll all night and party every day.
  Then it was every other day. Now I'm lucky if I can find half an hour a week in which to get funky....
• Let us go then you and I while the night is laid out against the sky like a smear of mustard on an old pork pie.
  "Nice poem Tom. I have ideas for changes though, why not come over?" -- Ezra...
• Q: What do you call a dog with no legs? A: What does it matter?
  He can't come anyway. [I got a dog with no legs -- I call him Cigarette....
• Do I have a lifestyle yet? -- Zippy the Pinhead
• Why I Can't Go Out With You: I'd LOVE to, but... -- I have to answer all of my "occupant" letters.
  -- None of my socks match. -- I'm having all my plants neutered....
• I don't like the sound of my phone ringing so I put my phone inside my fish tank.
  I can't hear it, but every time I get a call I see the fish go like this &l...
• Yes, but every time I try to see things your way, I get a headache.