Related:

• Before you beat the dog, learn his master's name.
• Have you @#%!ed your dog today?
• You know you're in a small town when... You don't use turn signals because everybody knows where you're going.
  You're born on June 13 and your family receives gifts from the local merchants because you're the first baby of the year....
• Please your Majesty," said the Knave, "I didn't write it, and they can't prove that I did
  here's no name signed at the end." "If you didn't sign it," said the King, "that only makes things worse....
• Many people write memos to tell you they have nothing to say.
• You may have heard that a dean is to faculty as a hydrant is to a dog. -- Alfred Kah