Related:

• That she won the game startled me cold. The way she won, the pattern of her thought on the chessboard, charmed me warm again and then some.
  -- Richard Bach, Thoughts of Richard Bach, The Bridge Across Foreve...
• The way my jeweler explained it, it's like insurance.
  Six months' pay isn't much to keep my wife from sleeping around....
• A woman was married to a golfer. One day she asked, "If I were to die, would you remarry?
  After some thought, the man replied, "Yes, I've been very happy in this marriage and I would want to be this happy again....
• To see her is to love her, And love but her foreve
  For Nature made her what she is, And never made anither!...
• She who hesitates is won.
• But to see her was to love her, Love but her, and love forever.
  For nature made her what she is, and ne'er made sic anither!...
• A young man and his girlfriend were walking along Main Street when she spotted a beautiful diamond ring in a jewelry-store window.
  Wow, I'd sure love to have that!" she gushed. "No problem," her companion replied, throwing a brick through the window and grabbing the ring....
• Marge: Maggie! We've got a surprise for you. [brings in the cake.
  Everyone takes photos of her, and Maggie gets frightened by the flashbulbs, candle flame, and darkened room....
• I call my girlfriend BASEBALL...She won't play without a diamond.