Related:

• How many Professors -- does it take to screw in a light bulb?
  None...what do you think their graduate students are for?...
• How many Stanford researchers -- does it take to screw in a light bulb?
  Three. One to hold the ladder, one to turn the bulb, and one to bill the government for the house....
• How many librarians -- does it take to screw in a light bulb?
  I don't know, but I can look it up for you....
• How many women with PMS -- does it take to screw in a light bulb?
  None. You can do it yourself, dammit....
• How many accountants -- does it take to screw in a light bulb?
  What kind of answer did you have in mind?...
• How many Mahayana Buddhists -- does it take to screw in a light bulb?
  Four - One to screw in the light bulb, one to not screw in the light bulb, one to not not screw in the light bulb, and one to not do any of those....
• How many hippies from Oregon -- does it take to screw in a light bulb? What's a light bulb?
• How many Englishmen -- does it take to screw in a light bulb?
  What do you mean change it? It's a perfectly good bloody bulb!...
• How many cops -- does it take to screw in a light bulb?
  Just one, but he is never around when you need him....