How Many Managers -- Does It Take To Change A Light Bulb?

How many blondes -- does it take to change a light bulb?
Three. One to hold the light bulb, two to spin the ladder....
How many university professors -- does it take to change a light bulb?
Only one, but they get three tech. reports out of it....
How many waitresses -- does it take to change a light bulb?
Three. Two to stand around bitching about it and one to go get the manager....
How many circus performers -- does it take to change a light bulb?
Four: One for the money, two for the show, three to get ready, and four to go!...
How many police -- does it take to change a light bulb?
Three. One to change it and two to direct traffic (eh?)...
How many Asians -- does it take to change a light bulb?
Three. One to change it and two to go to the cash & carry....
How many drummers -- does it take to change a light bulb?
One .. Two, and a-one two three fou...
How many philosophers -- does it take to change a light bulb?
Three. One to change it and two to stand around arguing over whether or not the light bulb exists....
How many socialists -- does it take to change a light bulb?
One to petition the Ministry of Light for a bulb, fifty to establish the state production quota, two hundred militia to force the factory unions to allow production of the bulb, and one to surreptitiously dial an '800' number to order an American light bulb....