Related:

• How many pessimists -- does it take to screw in a light bulb?
  None, the old one is probably screwed in too tight....
• How many women with PMS -- does it take to screw in a light bulb?
  None. You can do it yourself, dammit....
• How many residents of country towns -- does it take to screw in a light bulb?
  None, they're afraid there's been too much development already....
• How many feminists -- does it take to screw in a light bulb?
  None. It's not the light bulb that needs changing....
• How many thought police -- does it take to screw in a light bulb?
  None. There never was any light bulb....
• How many economists -- does it take to screw in a light bulb?
  None. If the light bulb really needed changing, market forces would have already caused it to happen....
• How many Christian Scientists -- does it take to screw in a light bulb?
  None, but it takes at least one to sit and pray for the old one to go back on....
• How many Essex Girls -- does it take to screw in a light bulb?
  None, they only screw in Cortina...
• How many frat guys -- does it take to screw in a light bulb?
  None. Frat boys screw in puddles of vomit....