Related:

• A man is known by the company he keeps avoiding.
• Women are like programs. A smart man keeps a backup. :)
• Women are just systems, & a smart man keeps a backup
• The longest sentence known to man: "I do.
• Mrs. Jones, Do You Know Me? A small-town prosecuting attorney called his first witness to the stand in a trial -- a grandmotherly, elderly woman.
  He approached her and asked, "Mrs. Jones, do you know me?...
• WOMAN: The most efficient money reducing agent known to man-kind!
• I knew this eccentric Frenchman who raises carp in the south of France.
  When the carp are full grown, he catches them, skins them, and makes men's wallets out of the skins....
• Silence = Death.
• We had a primary here a few weeks ago. Herbert Connolly, a candidate for reelection to the Governor's Council (a largely ceremonial body dating from the 1600s) lost by one vote, to Robert B.
  ("No relation") Kennedy, 14,716 to 14,715. Now it turns out that Connolly was so busy campainging that he neglected to go and vote for himself....