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• If Mr. Mondale loses this fall, of course, BOTH parties will face wide-open primaries in 1988, and maybe you should think about whether you want that on YOUR conscience.
• WHAT MEN REALLY MEAN =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= "I'm going fishing.
  Really means... "I'm going to drink myself dangerously stupid, and stand by a stream with a stick in my hand, while the fish swim by in complete safety....
• What does Saddam Hussain and panty hose have in common?
  They both rub a bush the wrong way....
• Pirates Long ago, when sailing ships ruled the waves, a captain and his crew were in danger of being boarded by a pirate ship.
  As the crew became frantic, the captain bellowed to his First Mate, "Bring me my red shirt!...
• The Captain: Long ago, when sailing ships ruled the waves, a captain and his crew were in danger of being boarded by a pirate ship.
  As the crew became frantic, the captain bellowed to his First Mate, "Bring me my red shirt!...
• Sir, I admit your general rule, That every poet is a fool.
  But you yourself may serve to show it, Every fool is not a poet....
• Men Are Like... 1. Men are like department stores..
  .. their clothes should always be half off. 2. Men are like vacations....
• Here is a joke from the March issue of Playboy: {ed But they didn't write it.
  } An infamous stud with a long list of conquests walked into his neighborhood bar and ordered a drink....
• YOU MIGHT BE AN ENGINEER IF... A team of you and your co-workers have set out to modify the antenna on the radio in your work area for better reception All your sentences begin with "what if" At Christma
  it goes without saying that you will be the one to find the burnt-out bulb in the string Buying flowers for your girlfriend or spending the money to upgrade your RAM is a moral dilemma Dilbert is your hero Everyone else on the Alaskan cruise is on deck peering at the scenery, and you are still on a personal tour of the engine room In college you thought Spring Break was a metal fatigue failure On vacation, you are reading a computer manual and turning the pages faster than someone else who is reading a John Grisham novel People groan at the party when you pick out the music The blinking 12...