Related:

• Wear a puppet on your hand and talk to other passengers through it.
• THE BIG PIG Received the following communication from Poor Innocent Guy Asa of Montgomery, Alabama
  These should come in handy at work or when frequenting a doctor's office...
• For fainting: Rub the person's chest or, if a lady, rub her arm above the hand instead.
  Or put the head between the knees of the nearest medical doctor....
• Kid: "Mommy, mommy, I don't want hamburgers!" Mommy
  Shut up and put your hand back in the meat grinder!...
• Things to do When Bored -Wax the ceiling -Rearrange political campaign signs -Sharpen your teeth -Play Houdini with one of your siblings -Braid your dog's hair -Clean and polish your belly button -Water your dog.
  ..see if he grows -Wash a tree -Knight yourself -Name your child Edsel -Scare Stephen King -Give your cat a mohawk -Purr -Mow your carpet -Play Pat Boone records backwards -Vacuum your lawn -Whine -Rake your carpet -Re-elect Richard Nixon -Critique "Three's Company" -Listen to a painting -Play with matches -Buff your cat -Race ferrets -Paint your house....
• Another harmless practical joke to be played on people living in multiple story apartment buildings is as follow
  Knock on victim's door. Say, "I've got to use your window, someone's about to jump from an apartment above yours....
• Put that in your smipe & poke i
• Are you a Klingon, or is that a turtle on your head?##
• Pentiums melt in your PC, not in your hand.