Related:

• I tried to drown my problems but they can swim!
• I have a speech impediment . . . my foot.
• I tried to drown my problems They swam, I didn't!
• My foot's alseep. I wonder what it's dreaming about?...
• Another "true" story, kinda like the aforementioned urban legend
  Enrico Fermi, while studying in college, was bored by his math classes....
• And I thought *I* had problems!
• I like my coffee black... as a moonless night.
• I don't like money - but it quiets my spirit.