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• 60 Actual Newspaper Headlines, Collected by Journalists 1.
  Something Went Wrong In Jet Crash, Expert Says 2. Police Begin Campaign To Run Down Jaywalkers 3....
• How many Soviet emigres does it take to change a light bulb?
  None. Soviet emigres aren't afraid to sit in the dark....
• Soviet Weekly in English: There is a Moscow exhibition of arts by 15,000 Soviet Republic printers and sculptors.
  These were executed over the past two years....
• The following problem can be solved either the easy way or the hard way.
  Two trains 200 miles apart are moving toward each othe...
• Two poets, Longfellow and Nash, were at the gates of heaven, and St.
  Peter told them there was only room for one poet in heaven at this time....
• Loo slips stink ships!
• At the Republican convention, some radicals presented themselves as an "organization," "Draft Dodgers for Quayle.
  One of them quipped: "The GOP nominated a drug dealer and a draft dodger....
• How many light bulbs does it take to change a Soviet emigre? One, if you aim well.
• What do a Soviet emigre and a fifteen-watt light bulb have in common? Neither one is very bright.