Related:

• Various Nights Before Christmas... A Microsoft Christmas 'Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the house Not a creature was stirring, except Papa's mouse.
  The computer was humming, the icons were hopping, As Papa did last minute Internet shopping....
• Straight Out Of The Eighties... This will only make sense to those of us who had the dubious distinction of being children of the eighties, or listened to music on a regular basis.
  If you were "there", then you will understand.... I was working part time in a five and dime....
• Benny, a first grader, was walking home from school when he saw a blinding flash of light and a puff of smoke
  in front of him stood his Fairy Godmother. She said, "I've come to grant you one wish and one wish only, what will it be?...
• One Liners If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried.
  A clean desk is a sign of a cluttered desk drawer....
• The Poles have a saying about how communist governments rewrite history
  "Only the future is certain; the past is always changing" A would-be bandit failed because he had written a holdup up note on another bank's withdrawal slip....
• The parish priest couldn't resist the pretty young girl.
  She was reciting her confession, and it was all too much for him....
• The ark lands after The Flood. Noah lets all the animals out.
  Says, "Go and multiply." Several months pass. Noah decides to check up on the animals....
• There was this young boy coming of age and his father wanted to show him the facts of life.
  So he gave him 20 bucks and sent him down to the local brothel to have a good time....
• Paybacks Are a Bitch There was this little boy about 12 years old walking down the sidewalk pulling a wagon and dragging a flattened frog on a string behind i
  when he comes up to the doorstep of a house of ill repute....