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• There once lived a nonconforming sparrow. When winter came, he didn't want to fly South with the rest of the birds.
  Finally, though, it got so cold that he reluctantly started flying South....
• Once upon a time, there was a non-conforming sparrow who decided not to fly south for the winter.
  However, soon after the weather turned cold, the sparrow changed his mind and reluctantly started to fly south....
• The Poles have a saying about how communist governments rewrite history
  "Only the future is certain; the past is always changing" A would-be bandit failed because he had written a holdup up note on another bank's withdrawal slip....
• W H Y C O P S H A T E Y O U <<<<&l
  < -if you have to ask get out of the way- Have you ever been stopped by a traffic cop and, while he was writing a ticket or giving you a warning, you got the feeling that he would just love to yank you out of the car, right through the window, and smash your face into the front fender?...
• The Bald Eagle... One day there was a man who was walking through the forest and got lost.
  He wandered around for over a week, and was beginning to starve....
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• Edited by Brad Templeton. MAIL, yes MAIL your jokes to watmath!
  looking!funny . Attribute the joke's source if at all possible....
• How about that footage on the news yesterday of our new Commander-in- Chief on the deck of the aircraft carrier (Teddy Roosevelt?
  ).. After throwing one of his snappy salutes (he's *almost* got that down), I half expected him to give the order, "Let's turn this thang around....
• A black guy and a gorilla go into a bar together. He says to the bartender, "I'd like a beer, and a gin and tonic for my girlfriend here.
  The bartender says, "Oh come on, pal, we don't serve no gorillas in here....