Once upon a time there was a great kingdom, with a not so great King.

Once upon a time there was a great kingdom, with a not so great King.
It seems that all the Barons and Counts and Dukes decided to plot to
kill the King and place one of them on the throne.
Well, the King had many spies and informants about, and he got wind of
what was taking place. The most prominent name that kept coming up was
the Count of Montacrisco, a rather slippery fellow, who had alluded
the King's men for quite some time now.
Finally the Count of Montacrisco was caught and brought before the
King to answer for his treason.
"I have heard of the conspiracy on my life. Who else was plotting to
commit this heinous crime?"
The Count spat in the King's face and declared, "I'll never tell!"
"OK," said the King, "bring in the Royal executioner! I'll give you
one more chance to tell."
"I'll never tell!"
The Royal executioner came in with his bright executioner's ax and
well used chopping block. The Count's neck was placed on the block.
The King said, "Alright, last chance, I am going to count to 10. If
you haven't told me what I want to know WHACK!!"
"1.....2....3....."
"I'll never tell!!"
"..4.....5......6.......7..."
"I'll never tell!!"
"....8......9....10!"
"OK! I'll tell , I'll tell!!"
But it was too late, the executioner's ax fell with a THUD, and the
Count's head fell off and rolled across the floor.
The moral of the story -
Don't ax your Counts before the chicken!

Georgy Porgy, pudding and pie
jerked off in his girlfreinds eye
When her eye was dried and shut
Georgy fucked that one eyed slut.