Computer Problems??? Take Heart, Anyone Among You Who Believes You Are Technologically Challenged, You "ain't Seen Nuthin'" Ye

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Computer Problems???
Take heart, anyone among you who believes you are technologically
challenged, you "ain't seen nuthin'" yet:
** Compaq is considering changing the command "Press Any Key" to "Press
Return Key" because of the flood of calls asking where the "Any" key is.
** AST technical support had a caller complaining that her mouse was hard to
control with the dust cover on. The cover turned out to be the plastic bag
the mouse was packaged in.
** Another AST customer was asked to send a copy of her defective diskettes.
A few days later a letter arrived from the customer along with photocopies
of the floppies.
** A Dell technician advised his customer to put his troubled floppy back in
the drive and close the door. The customer asked the tech to hold on and was
heard putting the phone down, getting up and crossing the room to close the
door to his room.
** Another Dell customer called to say he couldn't get his computer to fax
anything. After 40 minutes of trouble-shooting, the technician discovered
the man was trying to fax a piece of paper by holding it in front of the
monitor screen and hitting the "send" key.
** Yet another Dell customer called to complain that his keyboard no longer
worked. He had cleaned it by filling up his tub with soap and water and
soaking the keyboard for a day, then removing all the keys and washing them
** Still another Dell technician received a call from a customer who was
enraged because his computer told him he was "bad and an invalid." The tech
explained that the computer's "bad command" and "invalid" responses
shouldn't be taken personally.
** A confused caller to IBM was having troubles printing documents. He told
the technician that the computer had said it "couldn't find printer." The
user had also tried turning the computer screen to face the printer-but that
his computer still couldn't "see" the printer.
** An exasperated caller to Dell couldn't get her new Dell Computer to turn
on. After ensuring the computer was plugged in, the technician asked her
what happened when she pushed the power button. Her response, "I pushed and
pushed on this foot pedal and nothing happens." The "foot pedal" turned out
to be the computer's mouse.
** Another customer called Compaq tech support to say her brand-new computer
wouldn't work. She said she unpacked the unit, plugged it in and sat there
for 20 minutes waiting for something to happen. When asked what happened
when she pressed the power switch, she asked, "What power switch?"
** Another IBM customer had troubles installing software and rang for
support. "I put in the first disk, and that was OK. It said to put in the
second disk, and had some problems with the disk. When it said to put in the
third disk, I couldn't even fit it in..." The user hadn't realized that
"Insert Disk 2" meant to remove Disk 1 first.
** In a similar incident, a customer had followed the instructions for
installing software. The instructions said to remove the disk from its cover
and insert into the drive. The user had physically removed the casing of the
disk and wondered why there were problems.
** A woman called the Canon help desk with a problem with her printer. The
tech asked her if she was running it under "Windows." The woman responded,
"No my desk is next to the door. But that is a good point. The man sitting
in the cubicle next to me is under a window and his printer is working