Kids Will Be Kids...
A small boy is sent to bed by his father.
Five minutes later: "Da-ad..."
"What?"
"I'm thirsty. Can you bring me a drink of water?"
"No. You had your chance. Lights out."
Five minutes later: "Da-aaaad..."
"WHAT?"
"I'm THIRSTY...Can I have a drink of water??"
"I told you NO! If you ask again I'll have to spank you!!"
Five minutes later... "Daaaa-aaaad..."
"WHAT??!!"
"When you come in to spank me, can you bring me a drink of water?"
***************
An exasperated mother, whose son was always getting into mischief, finally
asked him, "How do you expect to get into Heaven?"
The boy thought it over and said, "Well, I'll just run in and out and in and
out and keep slamming the door until St. Peter says, 'For Heaven's sake,
Jimmy, come in or stay out!'"
***************
One summer evening during a violent thunderstorm a mother was tucking her
small boy into bed. She was about to turn off the light when he asked with a
tremor in his voice, "Mommy, will you sleep with me tonight?"
The mother smiled and gave him a reassuring hug. "I can't, dear," she said.
"I have to sleep in Daddy's room."
A long silence was broken at last by his shaky little voice: "The big
sissy."
***************
A mother took her three-year-old daughter to church for the first time.The
church lights were lowered, and then the choir came down the aisle, carrying
lighted candles. All was quiet until the little one started to sing in a
loud voice, "Happy birthday to you..."
A small boy is sent to bed by his father.
Five minutes later: "Da-ad..."
"What?"
"I'm thirsty. Can you bring me a drink of water?"
"No. You had your chance. Lights out."
Five minutes later: "Da-aaaad..."
"WHAT?"
"I'm THIRSTY...Can I have a drink of water??"
"I told you NO! If you ask again I'll have to spank you!!"
Five minutes later... "Daaaa-aaaad..."
"WHAT??!!"
"When you come in to spank me, can you bring me a drink of water?"
***************
An exasperated mother, whose son was always getting into mischief, finally
asked him, "How do you expect to get into Heaven?"
The boy thought it over and said, "Well, I'll just run in and out and in and
out and keep slamming the door until St. Peter says, 'For Heaven's sake,
Jimmy, come in or stay out!'"
***************
One summer evening during a violent thunderstorm a mother was tucking her
small boy into bed. She was about to turn off the light when he asked with a
tremor in his voice, "Mommy, will you sleep with me tonight?"
The mother smiled and gave him a reassuring hug. "I can't, dear," she said.
"I have to sleep in Daddy's room."
A long silence was broken at last by his shaky little voice: "The big
sissy."
***************
A mother took her three-year-old daughter to church for the first time.The
church lights were lowered, and then the choir came down the aisle, carrying
lighted candles. All was quiet until the little one started to sing in a
loud voice, "Happy birthday to you..."
Related:
- 100 Ways to Confuse Your Roommate
1. Insist that you are a vegetarian and protest anytime your roommate
eats meat.
Then leave "Slim Jim" wrappers on the floor and lie... - Various Nights Before Christmas...
A Microsoft Christmas
'Twas the night before Christmas,
when all through the house Not a creature was stirring... - W H Y C O P S H A T E Y O U <<<<<<
-if you have to ask get out of the way-
Have you ever been stopped by a traffic cop and, while... - Straight Out Of The Eighties...
This will only make sense to those of us who had the dubious distinction of
being children of the eighties,
or listened to music on a regular basis. If you were... - A 5-year-old girl gets a kitten for her birthday. Soon thereafter,
the Mom, while getting into the car slams the door... - RACIAL/ETHNIC
There were these two men drinking together in a bar.
One was of Chinese extraction, the other Jewish. ... - Once upon a time there was a sperm named Stanley who lived inside a
famous movie actor.
Stanley was a very healthy sperm. He'd do pushups ... - Paybacks Are a Bitch
There was this little boy about 12 years old walking down the sidewalk
pulling a wagon and dragging a flattened frog on a string behind it,
when he comes up to the doorstep of a house of ill... - The ark lands after The Flood. Noah lets all the animals out.
Says, "Go and multiply." Several months pass. Noah...
From the same category:
- Annual checkup
An 80-year old man was having his annual checkup and the doctor asked him
how he was feeling.
"I've never been better!" he boasted."I've got an eighteen... - TEXAS PHRASES:
** The engine's runnin' but ain't nobody driving
Translation:
Not overly-intelligent. ** Tighter than bark on a tree... - Apartment Ad Translation Guide
** SPACIOUS - hole in the wall;
compared to living in your car; that's why we're charging... - A sign I saw at a swimming pool once:
We don't swim in your toilet,
so please don't pee in our pool... - Beer Tested
USA, Palo Alto, CA (AP) -- "Yesterday scientists revealed that beer contains
small traces of female hormones.
To prove their theory, the scientists fed 100 men 12...
