Two drunks are driving down the highway, drinking their beer. All
of a sudden the driver noticed lights flashing in his mirror; the cops
are on his tail. His buddy asked, "What are we going to do?" The
driver said, "Don't worry. Just do exactly what I tell you and
everything will work out perfectly. First, peel the labels off our
beer bottles and we'll each stick one on our forehead. Then shove the
bottles underneath the seat, and let me do the talking."
They pull over and the cop walked up to the car. He looked at them
kind of funny, then asked to see the guy's driver's license. He asked
him, "Have you been drinking?" "Oh, no sir," the driver replied.
"I noticed you weaving back and forth across the highway. Are you
*sure* you haven't been drinking?" the cop asked. "Oh, no sir," the
drunk answered, "We haven't had a thing to drink tonight."
"Well, I've got to ask you," said the cop, "What on earth are those
things on your forehead?"
"That's easy, officer," replied the drunk confidently, "You see,
we're both alcoholics, and we're on the Patch!"
W H Y C O P S H A T E Y O U <<<<&l <
-if you have to ask get out of the way-
Have you ever been stopped by a traffic cop and, while he was
writing a ticket or giving you a warning, you got the feeling that
he would just love to yank you out of the car, right through the
window, and smash your face into the front fender?...