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• On the other hand, you have different fingers.
• On the other hand, you also have five fingers.
• Q: What would you have if you had a moth ball in one hand and a moth ball in the other hand?
  A: A bloody big moth!...
• Some Bumper Stickers: ** Laugh alone and the world thinks you're an idiot ** Your kid may be an honor student but you're still an IDIOt ** He who laughs last thinks slowest ** If you don't like the new
  go out and make some ** Be nice to your kids. They'll choose your nursing home ** I think animal testing is a terrible idea...
• Things to think about.... -Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard?
  -It's a dog eat dog world out there. And they're short on napkins....
• In a similar vein, tell your victim that you have a test of coordination you would like him to try with you.
  Find a door with a fairly large crack between the door and the wall when the door is open....
• AQUARIUS (Jan 20 - Feb 18) You have an inventive mind and are inclined to be progressive.
  You lie a great deal. On the other hand, you are inclined to be careless and impractical, causing you to make the same mistakes over and over again....
• Lawyer in the Bar... A well dressed lawyer went into a bar for a martini and found himself beside a scrungy-looking drunk who kept mumbling and studying something in his hand.
  The attorney leaned closer while the drunk held the tiny object up to the light, slurring "Well, it looks like plastic....
• A bum walked into a bar and sat down next to a drunk who was studying some- thing in his hand.
  The bum leaned closer as the drunk held the object up to the light....