Related:

• Man: {Hey, sir! Try our wax lips: the candy of 1000 uses.
  } Homer: {[skeptical] Like what?} Man: {One, a humorous substitute for your own lips....
• Announcer: And now we return to "Fox Night at the Movie
  Homer S.: Portrait of an Ass-Grabber", starring Dennis Franz....
• A Chicago salesman was about to check into a St. Louis hotel when he noticed a very charming woman staring admiringly at him.
  He walked over and spoke with her for a few minutes, then returned to the front desk, where they checked in as Mr....
• Gerry: Hi! Pleased to meet you, I just moved in. My name is Gerry Ford.
  Homer: [gasps] Former President Gerald Ford? Put her there!...
• Marge: Homer, are all these pockets necessary? Home
  They wouldn't be if you were willing to sit in a hollowed-out wheelchair!...
• Edna: Tonight's homework assignment is -- Ba
  [exaggerated] Oh, man: is it hot in here. I'd better take off my sweater....
• Homer: Ehh, someone had to take the babysitter home.
  Then I noticed she was sitting on the gummi Venus, so I grabbed it off her....
• Homer: Ooh, you like sweets, kids? I know a place that's sweeter than sweetness itself.
  In this sweet place, earthly donuts are sour as poison -- you'd spit them out, you would!...
• Letterman: And the number one reference that I am running into the ground is.
  .."Homer Simpson"! [music starts, audience laughs] [changes channel to Chespirito who gets his butt pinched] Chespirito...