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• Everything I like is either illegal, immoral or fattening. -- Alexander Woollco
• Anything good in life is either illegal, immoral, or fattening.
  Anything not fitting into these categories causes cancer in rats....
• Anything good in life is either illegal, immoral, or fattening.
  -- Pardo's First Postulate Anything not fitting into these categories causes cancer in rats....
• Pardo's First Postulate: Anything good in life is either illegal, immoral, or fattening.
  Arnold's Addendum: Everything else causes cancer in rats....
• Pardo's First Postulate: Anything good in life is either illegal, immoral, or fattening.
  Arnold's Addendum: Anything not fitting into these categories causes cancer in rats....
• Pardo's Postulates 1) Anything good is either illegal, immoral, or fattening.
  2) The three faithful things in life are money, a dog, and an old woman....
• Quote #176 Many things do not happen as they ought.
  Most things do not happen at all. It is for the conscientious historian to correct these defects....
• You will gain money by an illegal or immoral action.