Related:

• Do you know what happens when you slice a golf ball in half?
  Someone gets mad at you. I found this out the hard way. -- Deep Thoughts, by Jack Handey...
• A guy is standing in front of his locker at the country club admiring a golf ball he has in his hand.
  One of his golfing buddies says to him, "What'd you do, get some new golf balls?...
• Jacques: First, you must get to know your lane. Feel the slickness, feel the slippery finish.
  Caresses it, experience it. Quite smooth, isn't it?...
• What do you call a 6' 6" Angolan Guerilla with a sub-machine gun and six hand-grenades? "Sir.
• What do you call a half-dozen Indians with Asian flu? Six sick Sikhs (sic).
• Q: What do you call a half-dozen Indians with Asian flu? A: Six sick Sikhs (sic).
• One evening he spoke. Sitting at her feet, his face raised to her, he allowed his soul to be heard.
  My darling, anything you wish, anything I am, anything I can ever be....
• What do they call you? ...Kate. Isn't that a bit of a girl's name?
  ...It's short..for..erm...'Bob'. -- Edmund and Kate : Bell...
• Listen, Tyrone, you don't know how dangerous that stuff is.
  Suppose someday you just plug in and go away and never come back?...