Related:

• There's always one guy who tries to impress you with how big a joint he can roll.
  The guy takes the Sunday Times, drops a kilo brick in with the strings on it ....
• Dave: Mr. Simpson, if you want to be a good father, you have to spend time with your son.
  Homer: Well, that's easy for you to say, you .....
• Always code as if the guy who ends up maintaining, or testing your code will be a violent psychopath who knows where you live.
  -- Dave Carha...
• Why be born again, when you can just grow up?
• Chandler: I think you should go back with Gary. I don't wanna be the guy that breaks up a family, y'know when my parents split up, it was because of that guy.
  Whenever I would see him I was always think y'know 'You're the reason, you are the reason why their not together....
• Monica: Please tell me you_re stopping now. Pete: I_m fine!
  I'd fight tonight, if they_d let me. [stands up and starts swinging his arms] See this circle I'm marking off here?...
• You're not Dave. Who are you?
• Jacques: First, you must get to know your lane. Feel the slickness, feel the slippery finish.
  Caresses it, experience it. Quite smooth, isn't it?...
• You know you've been hacking too long when... ...you realize you have never seen half of your best friends.