Related:

• Where's Lee Harvey Oswald when you really need him?
• Negative, sucker. You need a smoking pistol and you know it.
  "Right you are. Where are those handguns when we really need them?" -- Doonesbury...
• Where's the Inquisition when we most need it the most?
• Quote #360 The tarring of any engineering project with the epithet `simple' is more often than not the result of the feeling of confidence that springs from inadequate comprehension of the situation.
  -- SubG...
• Quote #357 I generally regard flipping through `popular' publications on technical subjects in the same category as consulting the faqs for various newsgroups or reading most annotated bibliographies.
  Or perhaps in the same vein as pornography; nobody (well, nobody worth mentioning, anyway) seriously thinks that that's the way things actually work, but some can take consolation in it when the real thing is in abscence or is inconvienient....
• I'm mentally OVERDRAWN! What's that SIGNPOST up ahead?
  Where's ROD STERLING when you really need him? -- Zippy the Pinhead...
• Marge: Somebody stop the fight! Where's the doctor?
  ! [guess who's the fight doctor?] Dr....
• Guy Fawkes where are you now that we need you?
• Moriarity Realty: When you need new Holmes.