Related:

• She was ugly! She was known as a two-bagger. That's a girl who's so ugly, when you go out with her you put a bag over your head in case the bag over her head breaks.
  She was so ugly, you look in the dictionary under "ugly" and you see her picture....
• I saw Elvis at the post office. Bought his picture for 29 cents.
• Pink-Shirt Book: "The Peter Norton Programmer's Guide to the IBM PC".
  The original cover featured a picture of Peter Norton with a silly smirk on his face, wearing a pink shirt....
• Zero defects: The result of shutting down a production line.
  -- Kelvin Throop III, "The Management Dictionary...
• SLANG, n. The grunt of the human hog (_Pignoramus intolerabilis_) with an audible memory.
  The speech of one who utters with his tongue what he thinks with his ear, and feels the pride of a creator in accomplishing the feat of a parrot....
• The Cuckoo's Egg: Clifford Stoll Doubleday 1989 ISBN 0-385-24946-2 Clifford Stoll's absorbing tale of how he tracked Markus Hess and the Chaos Club cracking ring nicely illustrates the difference between `hacker' and `cracker'.
  Stoll's portrait of himself, his lady Martha, and his friends at Berkeley and on the Internet paints a marvelously vivid picture of how hackers and the people around them like to live and how they think....
• The best measure of a man's honesty isn't his income tax return.
  It's the zero adjust on his bathroom scale. -- Arthur C. Clarke...
• The Advertising Agency Song: When your client's hopping mad, Put his picture in the ad.
  If he still should prove refractory, Add a picture of his factory....