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• A googoolplex of channels, and nothing's on TV!
• Keep changing. When you're through changing, you're through. -- Bruce Barto
• There is no happiness when there is no hockey.
• The cable TV sex channels don't expand our horizons, don't make us better people, and don't come in clearly enough.
  -- Bill Mahe...
• Smooth Jimmy Apollo: [explaining his poor prediction] Well, folks, when you're right 52% of the time, you're wrong 48% of the time.
  Homer: Why didn't you say that before!!...
• I liked O.J. better when he was a commercial & I could switch channels.
• Homer: Hey, we haven't watched TV in a while! [turns it on] Ke
  Tonight, "Eye On Springfield" takes a look at the secret affairs of Kennedy, Eisenhower, Bush, and Clinton....
• It's hard to predict the future when liberals keep changing the past.