Related:

• Dan Quayle may not have been wanted by his parents, who kept asking him, after he was born, why he was not more like Gertrude.
  Gertrude died at birth....
• An egotist thinks he's in the groove when he's in a rut.
• There was a young man of Cape Horn Who wished he had never been born, And he wouldn't have been If his father had seen That the end of the rubber was torn.
• A fanatic is a man who does what he thinks the Lord would do if He knew the facts in the case.
• If he had been born God, it was the clowns who would occupy the lowest rungs of hell.
• The man who says what he thinks is finished, and the man who thinks what he says is an idiot.
• He did not mean to be cruel. If anybody had called him so, he would have resented it extremely.
  He would have said that what he did was done entirely for the good of the country....
• A politician is a man who stands for what he thinks the voters will fall for.