Related:

• How many members of the U.S.S. Enterprise -- does it take to change a light bulb?
  7. Scotty will report to Captain Kirk that the light bulb in the Engineering Section is burnt out, to which Kirk will send Bones to pronounce the bulb dead....
• Q: How many members of the U.S.S. Enterprise does it take to change a light bulb?
  A: Seven. Scotty has to report to Captain Kirk that the light bulb in the Engineering Section is getting dim, at which point Kirk will send Bones to pronounce the bulb dead (although he'll immediately claim that he's a doctor, not an electrician)....
• Commander Kirk, you have the bridge.
• Saavik: "Begging the admiral's pardon, General Order Fifteen, 'No flag officer shall beam into a hazardous area without armed escort.
  '" Kirk: "There's no such regulation." Saavik: [Gives Kirk the "Yes there is" look] Kirk...
• Kirk: "Clear the bridge." -- "STII:TWOK", Stardate 8130.4
• Beam me up, Scotty. There's no intelligent life here. -- James Tiberius Kirk
• Kirk: "Gentlemen, *beam* me aboard." -- "The Doomsday Machine", Stardate 3842.4.
• Kirk to Enterprise -- beam down yeoman Rand and a six-pack.
• Kirk to Enterprise -- beam down yeoman Rand and a six-pack.