Related:

• The next morning our youth was a memory, and our happiness was a lie.
  Life is like a bad margarita with good tequila, I thought as I poured some whiskey onto my granola and faced a new day....
• The vice president for human resources at Climpson Industries sent the following recommendation to the company's president.
  "In an effort to improve our employees' productivity, we should implement electronic monitoring of employees' Internet use from their workstations....
• It's] time for the human race to enter the solar system.
  -- Vice President Dan Quayle on the concept -- of a manned mission to Ma...
• Things will get better despite our efforts to improve them. -- Will Roge
• Psychiatry enables us to correct our faults by confessing our parents' shortcomings.
  -- Laurence J. Peter, "Peter's Principle...
• The following appeared as part of a recommendation made by a faculty member to the president of a large university.
  "Never once in our 150-year history as a university have we clarified our objectives....
• Life is hard? True--but let's love it anyhow, though it breaks every bone in our bodies.
  -- Edward Abbey...
• The following appeared in a memo from the president of a chain of cheese stores located throughout the United States.
  "For many years all the stores in our chain have stocked a wide variety of both domestic and imported cheeses....